Beauty, Peril, and Friendship - by: kaye

Blogs

 Blogs.  I’ve always wanted to make one.  Just a simple means of sharing all my exciting (or even the most modest and ordinary) experiences I have encountered in my everyday existence.  Or merely just a channel of divulging my thoughts.   A trail of words I could always fondly look back at.  This time, I finally get to write one.  I just never thought that my very first blog would be of that experience I had not imagined even in my wildest dreams. 

Mundane Fun under the Sun

Last April 18, 2008, few of my office mates decided to finally go to Anawangin Beach at Pundaquit, Zambales.  I have recently joined them in their nature trips, where we’d start off with a mountain hike followed by swimming at the beach after the trek.  This escapade however  have been a special one, for all-month long we have waited to go there, and we just simply all go gaga every time we check out the websites that featured the place.   It was also the group’s bonding moment with Arnel who’s about to end his vacation here in the Philippines before going back to Thailand where he is now working.  So along with Rene, Manny, Arnold, Archie, Niel, Elaine, Joms, and also with Julie & Ely who are new to the group, we finished our submittals at work, did our last-minute shopping , packed our bags and head north.  Anawangin was simply breathtaking.  This serene, undisturbed & enchanting beauty of Zambales was really worth the trouble, as we have encountered many inconveniences in almost every part of the trip – all bus rides at the Pasay terminal to Zambales were fully booked, LRT got busted, we couldn’t find an fx or a van so we decided to ride a jam-packed bus instead, etc..   And breathtaking it was, that the moment we first stepped ashore to this beautiful beach  (all equipped with our trek bags and hiking gears) we simply couldn’t resist the inviting splash of the waves, and the fresh sea breeze amidst the blazing sun - and without hesitation decided to cancel the climb, and enjoy the refreshing coolness of the waters.  (When we arrived at Zambales at 3:30 in the morning, we hiked a 50-meter hill at San Antonio, Pundaquit to have a short rest before waiting for sunrise and catch a boat going to Anawangin Beach.  We decided it would be our “climb” for this trip, so we could hit the waters right away.) The Danger Beneath Everyone was so excited and thrilled, and just wanted to enjoy the beach.  All of us were having a good time - may it be exploring the island with its quiet lagoon & pine trees along the shoreline; capturing photos of nature’s exquisite beauty and its vacationing populace, dipping in the shallow but strong waves of the beach; or merely laid-back relaxing at the campsite.  We were all having such a good time, that nobody had a clue of the chaos that was about to come. 

Joms, Julie and Arnel were already far from the coast when Elaine, Neil & I dipped in the waters to join them.  It was about 5 o’clock in the afternoon.  We were swimming at the picturesque rocky shores at the rightmost part of the beach, but decided to go to the leftmost area instead where the waves are stronger, as we were riding along the waves “ala surfers”.  While we were already enjoying the big waves, the others were still so much afar taking their time walking along the shore as they try to catch up with us on our “new spot”.  The slope of the beach was minimal and steady, that we were so far away from the shore but the water was still waist-high deep.  Or so we thought. 

  The splash of the waters continues to grow bigger, stronger, and more frequent as they hit us.  Unconsciously, I did a head count for all of us in the water when I realized that we were one person short.  As I scanned the zone for familiar faces, I noticed a hand stretched out from underneath as if trying to grab something, and realized that it was of our friend’s – Arnel’s.   I was uncertain at first if he it was all just a prank, but I suddenly felt alert that I could not take my eyes off of him.   As the next wave smashed at us, two hands remained outstretched while his head remained submerged in the waters.  Then it hit me.. Arnel is really drowning!  I panicky told Joms and Julie, who were near me at that time, and started to swim to Arnel while screaming at the top of our lungs… “SAKLOLO!!!!  TULONG!!!”  We tried to swim as fast as we could but could only make small progress.  When Julie and I finally reached him, he strongly grabbed at the both of us and we all sank underneath.  We tried to keep Arnel’s head up in the waters but to no avail.  Arnel had drank so much water that keeping his head up was simply not enough to calm him down.  His eyes were full of fear and dread.  As he continues to struggle for air, Julie and I were also starting to drown as we could not loosen his grip.  When Julie could not hold it any longer, she raised Arnel up as hard as she could and swam to shore to ask for help. The waves above us and the current dragging us underneath were so strong that keeping afloat was an arduous task.  As I was left with Arnel, we continued to struggle for air and tried to stay above the waters as I swam profusely.  But Arnel was so strong, and he easily overpowered me with his struggles.  Soon enough, it was very difficult to lift his head above the waters as well as mine’s.  I was starting to ingest a lot of water myself, and my mind was racing on how to keep us afloat.  I could feel my lungs desperately grasping for air, and my chest hurt so bad I felt as if it was going to explode.  I continued to scream for help with any chance I got, while muttering a silent prayer for our mere survival as water drowned my last syllables as we go under.  My mind continued to race as I think of other ways that might help us breathe, as it occurred to me that we will both not survive if I could not do anything else.  And just like a quick answer to a prayer, Rene appeared from nowhere and helped me and Arnel catch a breath.  But Arnel had been struggling for so long, and eventually lost consciousness.  The Agony of Uncertainty  

With Arnel unconscious, all we could think about was to revive him in the soonest possible time.  All of our strength nearly drained, we focused on reaching the shore.  Thankfully, someone close by swam to us and carried Arnel to shore.  While Arnel was being carried, we could see that his mouth and nose were already foaming.  His lips were now purple, and the color of life on his skin was already started to fade.  His eyes were half-open - reddish with exhaustion; one pupil in upward direction, the other at the side.  There was no sign of life in Arnel.   Is he..? Could he be..? NO!!!  I could not entertain such thoughts.  If he could no longer fight to live, then we have to fight for him.  We could not give up.  It was simply not an option.

 
Arnel was given CPR.  First was by an intro diver who happened to be visiting Anawangin.  She said she had basic knowledge of CPR, and tried to revive Arnel.  A few moments later, a med student who also happened to be in the island with her friends took over and continued to revive him.  He had been down in the water for so long, and at that point Arnel still did not have a pulse.  His mouth and nose just kept on foaming.  I was afraid Arnel’s dentures may choke him, so the med student yanked it out of his mouth.  All this time, Elaine and I were on each side of Arnel, holding his hands and urging him to fight.  Elaine could not stop crying and was continuously waking Arnel up.  I, on the other hand, fought hard to hold my tears back, thinking that I may not stop crying once I started doing so.  I fear that a single tear may lose all the strength left that I had in me – strength that I, and all of us, desperately needed at that time.  I was glad Elaine had shared her tears, so she could cry for the both of us.  I was unaware where our other friends were at that time, since a lot of people have hovered around us.  I was certain though that they were all doing everything they can to alleviate the situation - may it be getting help in finding a boat, finding improvised gears to help Arnel breath, placing a shirt and a towel to lift Arnel’s head up, or simply muttering a prayer.. which was all I can do at that point.  Few moments passed by, but there was still no response from Arnel.  The med student continued to give him CPR.  I tried to check his pulse, and couldn’t find one.  Then Arnel threw up some water, a lot of water, but still did not gain consciousness.  The water just keeps getting out of his body mainly because of the pumping of his chest.  Someone placed a towel under his neck to lift his head up, to ease the water out of his system.  Then she said Arnel’s heart started to beat, slowly.  I took his wrist, and felt a weak pulse.  When I checked again, his heart was beating furiously fast when I realized that it was my own heartbeat that I was hearing and not his.  I ceased checking his pulse and looked at his chest slowly rising up and down, then stayed alert for every little clue of his recovery.  Thank God his heart was now beating on its own.  That was the first good thing that happened in those few short minutes that already seemed like hours. 

When she said that Arnel was already gaining consciousness, I took his hand in mine and asked him to press my hand if he could hear us.  I kept on doing this, while assuring him that he was no longer in danger and was already safe with his friends.  But he did not press my hand back.  There was not even a slight twinge from his fingers.  Why was he not responding?  She already said he was conscious, so why couldn’t he hear us?  I looked closely at his eyes, and realized that he was not yet awake.  He was still not conscious.  The tears from his eyes that were mistakenly taken as a sign of his consciousness was merely a reflex of his own body.  He was not yet awake.  He was still not back.  He was still in danger.  When that realization hit me, I started to cry.

Struggle for Life

Thinking that the ones giving him first aid may start to be lax in treating him believing that he was already awake, I shouted again and again that he was not yet conscious.  I was not aware that I was already crying at that time, until someone held my shoulders as if to assure me that everything will eventually turn alright.  It was Rene.  Thankfully, that pat in the back was exactly what I needed to regain my focus on the task at hand.  I held my tears back with a renewed strength.  We would not lose a friend.  We could not.  Not this way. Then someone took over at giving aid with Arnel.  He said he was a doctor.  Good thing somebody found one since he also just happened to be vacationing at the beach with his friends or family.  It occurred to us that there were no hospitals or clinics within the island, nor any kind of emergency station in the area.  He laid Arnel at his side, and massaged him at the stomach which had the same effect as giving him CPR.  Moments later, a boat arrived.   

Boats go to Anawangin only when there are scheduled trips for the tourists that go there.  The visitors must confirm to the boatmen the time they will leave the island, so they could have a boat to ride in.  Other than that, boats do not usually go to Anawangin.  That was why it was very fortunate that there was a small boat in the shore at that time.  We later learned that the boatman was the son of the owner of the area where we paid 50 pesos each so we could pitch a tent.  Arnel was carried by four or six men onto the boat.  Since the boat was only small, the boatman said that only 2 persons could come along with Arnel.  Since I knew the detailed account of mostly everything that happened starting from the moment he has been under the water, I climbed in the boat thinking that all these information would be needed at the hospital once they started treating him.  There was a short hesitation on who else would come with, but then later decided that the doctor should be the one to come along.  Once set, the boatman & his comrade, Arnel, the doctor, and I, set sails to the hospital.

It was a bumpy ride.  The strong and big waves of the sea kept on hammering the boat; I wondered how long the small craft could take such assault.  Arnel was still lying at his back on the wooden floorboard unconscious, his head at his side, slightly elevated with a towel we brought with us to lift his head.  I was sitting quietly while supporting his head up, while the doctor was on the other end of the boat searching for any sign of consciousness from Arnel.  A lot of water was still coming out of his mouth, though the foaming has stopped.  The doctor said the moment he gained consciousness, the probability of his recovery without further mental and physical injuries would be high.  I was praying loudly at that time, almost like a chant, as we surrender everything that was going to happen next in God’s hands.  Since Arnel was already breathing on his own, we were worried at that time of the mental damages that may arise because of his continued unconsciousness.  Then his head slightly jerked up.  I was not sure if it was because of the waves, or if Arnel was staring to gain consciousness.  The doctor also noticed it.  Then Arnel moved his head up again, this time jerking higher.  He asked me if Arnel was doing it on his own, and I confirmed it.  New hope has risen from me, now that Arnel was starting to gain consciousness.  When I lifted my hand to shift support for his head, I noticed a red smear on my palm.  Then he lifted his head up again, and saw the same red smear all over the towel that was supporting his head.  The clean towel that was strikingly white before was now deep crimson red.  It was blood.  Arnel was coughing out blood.

Chaos The moment I realized that it was now blood coming out of his mouth, I started to panic.  Where was the blood coming from?  Why was there so many blood?  Could it be that his lungs have been ruptured?  What did it mean?  Could he have damaged his lungs but still be alright?  How worse was the situation now?  Could he still survive?  My mind was racing again while keeping Arnel subdued.  When he started to gain consciousness, he started to move uncontrollably.  He kept on throwing his hands profusely, and kept on kicking his feet and screaming.  I tried to sit him up at first, but the doctor told me to keep him lying down with his head to the side.  I was nervously crying at this time now, worried about the blood that Arnel kept coughing out.  The doctor calmed me down by saying that showing my fears would somehow affect my friend’s recovery.  With this in mind, I kept on saying words of assurance to Arnel, almost to his ear so he could hear the words amidst the roaring motor of the boat and the fury of the wind and the waves - believing that those words would somehow reach his subconscious and encourage him not to give up. 

I was having a hard time restraining Arnel.  Every five seconds, he would move unmanageably then lose consciousness again.  I had to put my weight on his shoulders to keep him lying down.  But he could still jerk his head up.  And every time he did so, he would bang his head on the sharp corner of the piece of wood that supports the boat.  I could not hold his head from jerking up, so I placed my hand between his head and the wood to lessen the blow - fearing that it may cause him more mental damage if he continued to do so.  My hand hurt so bad, it felt like it would break.  Then, Arnel started to scream and move boisterously again.  This time, he was so strong I thought the boat would tip over.  The tide was also strong, that it felt like it would sink our small boat.  The doctor was holding his feet down, while I tried to pin down his shoulders.  All this time Arnel was screaming hysterically, his movements at random while throwing his hands and feet up in the air.  He would even roll his whole body in the confined spaces of the boat, screaming and struggling.  He was really not conscious.  His actions were more like reflex of his body.  He was like dreaming while he was awake.  It was as if he was still in the water fighting for his life.  He was in delirium.

The Long Journey to the Hospital The boat ride took about 30 minutes.  When we reached the dock, I thought the hospital was just nearby.  It turned out we docked on another resort, where we would then travel by land to reach the hospital.  It was so hard to get help.  The people at the beach were either too stunned or too disheartened to help.  I had to basically plead at each one of them to help carry my friend onto a vehicle so we could go to the hospital.  The boatman, whose name I later learned was Max, was the only one carrying Arnel.  A few moments later, some men finally helped carry our friend.  But there was no other transportation available but a tricycle.  Max seated Arnel with him inside with Arnel’s back on top of him.  I seated at the back ride with one hand inside supporting Arnel’s head as much as I can.  I did not realize then that I had no slippers on and was only wearing my swim wear.  The doctor could no longer come along, as the tricycle could not accommodate more.  He instructed me to just keep doing what I was doing, and wished us good luck.  I gave the doctor my gratitude and head off for the hospital. After a 10 to 15-minute ride, the tricycle stopped at the front of a building which I thought was the hospital.  It turned out it was only the barangay hall, and we would just transfer Arnel to the barangay mobile, which was like a mini-van of some sort.  My heart almost sank when I learned that the nearest hospital was still 30 minutes away.     Arnel was still in and out of consciousness every 5 seconds, and would continue to move and scream uncontrollably.  I was grateful that the boatman, Max, was with me then.  I thanked him while the barangay captain, who went along, asked me a lot of questions.  Where are you from?  Manila.  Where were you swimming?  Anawangin.  How many of you did you come? 11.  When did you arrive? Yesterday.  Did you hire a boat to go there?  Yes.  When were you planning on leaving?  Tomorrow.  Did you know that a lot of tourists had drowned in that area…? - - No, we didn’t. I almost could not answer.   And nobody told us, nor has given us the slightest clue of the danger that awaits us there.  A  lot of people have been drowning there since March - most of whom, said the barangay captain, had died. 

In between the questions, I continued to speak words of encouragement to Arnel saying that he was already safe and sound out of the water, and he only has to hold on a little longer as we nearly reach the hospital.  “Our friends would also be here in a little while”, I assured him.  I was not sure if it was the lengthy ride to the hospital, or if my adrenaline was starting to wear off, but I started to relax in spite of Arnel’s delirious episodes.  I kept on thinking that he would be finally given proper care once we reach the hospital.   I prayed.  That was all I could do at the moment.

A Strange Place When we finally reached the hospital, Arnel was immediately brought to ER.  After I told them that he nearly drowned, the attending nurse quickly asked me if the woman brought in the hospital earlier that day was part of our group.  No, I answered him.  It turned out the woman also drowned, and died.  Way to welcome a new patient in a hospital. They gave him first aid treatments and dextrose.  Arnel keeps on pushing away the oxygen that they put on him.  I was then sent off to the information desk where a nurse asked about his personal information - all of which I could not answer except for his full name.  Since he was just vacationing in the country, I could not tell where he was currently staying.  I don’t know his address.  I was not sure when his birthday is.  Since I don’t have anything with me and left my phone along with our things at the beach, I don’t know how to contact his immediate family.  The nurse gave me this judging look, then huddled back with his colleagues.  I told them that our friends would be with us shortly, and they would give them all the information they need.  I then went to Arnel who was having another delirium at that time.  After a while, the same nurse who asked me before about Arnel’s information bombarded me with the same set of questions.  This time, he had brought another nurse along, while I continue to give the same answer I have given them before - I don’t know.  They told me that they needed the information for their records.  “Couldn’t he be treated unless I answer all your questions first?” I snapped back.  The other nurse who sensed my irritation, then explained that Arnel was already being treated with first aid but has to get all the necessary information before he could be admitted in the hospital.  “All of your questions would be answered when my friends get here”, I answered.  Discomfited and a little embarassed by my own anger, I went back to Arnel’s side and held to him the nebulizer the attending nurse gave him earlier to help him breathe. Exhausted but restless, anxious, troubled, cold, and a little irritated… I was so glad to see familiar faces walk in the hospital doors.  It was Rene and Manny.  Finally, there were people who share my worries.  It felt so strange and lonely at this place. The doctor attending him said that they could do nothing more but to observe his condition for at least 4 hours, then take an x-ray once he became stable to make sure there is no water left in his lungs.  It was such a relief when I saw Rene and Manny that when they asked me how Arnel was doing, I could not help myself but cry while I told them about what the doctor said about our friend’s condition. 

Arnel’s state continued to be like how it was when he was in the boat and during our way to the hospital.  He would continue to slip in and out of consciousness, and would never stop screaming as he continued to be delirious.  Whenever he opens his eyes, he could not recognize anyone and would just keep on fighting off everyone.  And we could not recognize him either.  The bubbly person that he was seemed to have left him.  He seemed like a totally different person.  There was just no telling how he really was. 

Moments later, Elaine and Ely came. 

Between Life and Death

 I was not sure how Elaine and Ely got there.  When I saw them, Elaine and I just hugged each other, and cried.  The three of us then prayed together and lifted all our concerns to God.  There was a feeling of calmness that went over me after we prayed.  Somehow, I felt that we would all going to get through this.  Manny and Rene on the other hand were at that time talking to the doctor and busy buying all the medicines prescribed for Arnel’s quick recovery.  The five of us then took turns on talking small words to Arnel, assuring him that he was already safe.   Elaine and Ely had brought along Arnel’s things with them.  We rummaged through his things to find means of contacting Arnel’s family.  We later learned that Arnel only brought his roaming phone, which was why the contact numbers listed were limited.  Ely called every possible contact in Arnel’s phone to be able to reach his family, but to no avail.  Ely was also busy coordinating with the rest of our group who were at that time on their way to the hospital.  It was dark now and they had just docked after their horrifying ride from the boat.  They had packed all our things in a jiffy, and were all anxious to hear about Arnel’s condition.  Elaine and I were on stand-by assisting Arnel, while Rene and Manny did all the leg work – buying required medicine, scouting the area and finding a place to sleep for the whole group, and even at some point, gave Arnel a bath when he excreted at the bed because of the medicines given to him. Meanwhile, after almost 2 to 3 hours after Arnel has been brought to the hospital, he was finally calming down.  He was no longer delirious, but kept on slipping in and out of consciousness.  He kept on staring at us every time he opened his eyes, and would not recognize anyone or anything.  Though we feel that he may be alright physically, we all dread that he might be not okay mentally.    Unfolding of a Miracle  The rest of our friends finally arrived at the hospital.  There were vacant rooms in a resort exactly beside the hospital where we could spend the night.  Arnel was then admitted in the hospital ward, but could not be given an x-ray exam since he was not yet stable.  Since visiting hours was way over at the ward, the hospital allowed only a maximum of two persons to stay with Arnel.  We all agreed to take turns watching over him.  After receiving instructions from Rene, Archie and Arnold took over watching Arnel.  It was already 12:30 in the morning.  The rest of the group stayed at the resort to freshen up, while the others went to buy some food for dinner.  Niel was comforting me as I relayed to them everything that has happened since I climbed in the boat. At 1:30 am, Archie called and informed us that Arnel was starting to recognize them but he was not yet fully recovered.  Our hopes had risen up.  Tired and worn out, I quickly fell to sleep once my head hit the pillows. I was awakened by similar voices in a conversation.  They were talking about how Arnel has fully recovered, and was back to his old self as if nothing has happened.  Was this really happening, or was it just a dream?  I opened my eyes and saw Manny and Rene talking.  It was true indeed.  Arnel was out of danger.  Thank God.  As far as they can tell, he had no serious physical injuries except for the bruises he obtained from his struggles in the boat.  He also had no mental injuries, except… he could not remember anything about his whole ordeal. At the hospital, Arnel was already sitting up talking and laughing with Arnold, Julie and Joms.  If he was not in a hospital with dextrose, he would not have believed that he nearly drowned.  His last recollection was of him enjoying the beach of Anawangin, and marveling at the big, strong wave that was about to hit him.  

A Check at Reality

Everything went back to normal as we were settling our bills and preparing Arnel for discharge from the hospital.  Relieved from the danger we have surpassed, everyone was in a happy mood, laughing even at the corniest of jokes.  We were all even teasing about each other’s actions and approach to the situation as if they were some kind of bloopers in a comedy show.  But in spite of all the bliss and the hilarity, we all came to realize that life is indeed precious, and each one’s safety should never be taken for granted.  Everything could drastically change in one quick instance.  One simple mistake is all it takes to make or break our lives.  A lesson we have learned the hard way.   Blessing in Disguise  Chris, who was contacted by Elaine and Ely, was generous enough not just to drive us out of the city but also shared his home in Olongapo where we could rest and eat lunch before the long trip back home.  But before we left, we all joined hands and offered a prayer of thanks.  We were able to experience God’s faithfulness first-hand as He continued to guide and strengthen us throughout this incident.  God was there with us right from the beginning – of how Arnel and I stayed afloat, when in reality, I do not even know how to swim!  Or when Rene suddenly showed up when I thought I could no longer hold my breath.  Also when there were med students and a doctor who happened to be vacationing at the island.  Or when a small boat happened to be there at that time to help bring Arnel to the hospital.  Or when in the hospital, Arnel would show little signs through his responses that he was fighting to recover.  And especially when we prayed and lifted all our worries to God that night, Arnel had immediately recovered the very next day. 

It was indeed a miracle that Arnel had survived.  Not just because he had no serious physical injuries, but also because he did not obtain any mental injuries.  He is not even suffering from a trauma since he could not remember the whole ordeal!  But what touched me the most, is how he has acknowledged God’s presence in our midst in everything that has happened.  Everything happens for a reason.  We finished our prayer in tears.  This incident has brought as all closer together.  As Arnold wisely puts it, we are now just no longer trek mates and hike buddies - we are all now friends.

Blogs, Short Stories, Novels…

The details are still all so vivid, yet so surreal.  It was like in a dream.  Writing about what we have been through, I realized a blog was simply not enough.  Call this an essay or a short story or a narrative - whatever you like. I blame it on every movie & television shows I have watched, and even in novels and stories I have read, about scenarios like this.  Blog or not, I’m glad to share our experience along with the lessons we have learned out of it.  Maybe someday I could actually write a blog.  Someday.